Script: Beer

Beer posted on June 8, 2007.

Amir: So drunk.
Jake: You're drunk right now?
A: No, last night I got so drunk.
J: Oh, you--nice.
A: I had, like, so many beers.
J: How many--how many is so many?
A: I was like so retarded.
J: You were? How many beers did you have?
A: Sixty.
J: Sixty? That's--sixty is way too many. That's not a believable number at all.
A: I know. How many is believable?
J: Twelve?
A: Yeah, I know. Twelve. I had twelve.
J: You had twelve?
A: I had twelve beers, yeah. Stupid, afterwards.
J: I don't believe you. I don't think you even know--I don't think you've had beer, ever.
A: Yeah, right. I drink it all the time.
J: What does it taste like?
A: Sweet. So sweet. Like sug--what?
J: It's not sweet. Like sugar?
A: No, it tastes not like sugar. It tastes like the opposite.
J: Closer. Like what?
A: Like you're drinking--like you're drinking a sourdough baguette.
J: No. That's not it either.
A: Here's 2--that was 2 things it doesn't taste like.
J: Exactly, so what does it taste like?
A: It tastes--you know, it's like--beer's water. It's like a fermentable starch source, alright? Malted barley, yeast, it's common for flavoring to be added--
J: Like hops, a mixture of starch sources to be used with a secondary starch source. Uh, yeah. You're on the Wikipedia page, I'm reading it, too. Rice and sguar often being turned into junk, especially when you used with...
A: Yeah, I see where you're at, but I wasn't reading it.
J: You see where I'm at, but you weren't reading it?
A: Why, what are you doing tonight? How many beers are you gonna have? I'll double it, easy.
J: I'm not drinking tonight, I have to take my cat to the vet, actually.
A: Take a drink before or after, whatever you drink--
J: She has heart palpitations and they might have to put her down.
A: So sick.